Monday, March 26, 2012

rut busters

Monday seems a good day to tackle a topic that I have a couple of friends dealing with at the moment. That is, that irky horrible place that we all pass through from time to time when we are - in a rut. This topic may seem a little left of centre to what I normally post about, however I figure I began this blog to inspire readers to live healthy, happy, creative lives so this fits with that. And who doesn't know a mother who hasn't felt like the sentence 'another day another dish to wash' sums up their life!

I'm hoping my list of rut-busters starts the conversation with you dear readers to share what works for you.

Before we begin, I did a search on being stuck in a rut and found this definition that fits with what I'm talking about:

"It is when your life is the same all the time and nothing much is changing or happening. A rut is like a channel that would have been worn into the ground in the same place by a stage coach or car or any vehicle going over and over again. It becomes so worn, that it is hard to get out once something goes in. Life can be like that at times. So that is what they mean by being stuck in a rut." Taken from

And this at the top of the Google results page, which I found hilarious:


  1. A long deep track made by the repeated passage of the wheels of vehicles.
  2. An annual period of sexual activity in deer and some other mammals, during which the males fight each other for access to the females.

So, assuming your rut involves feeling like you are getting nowhere rather than anything involving deers here are some ideas to get you skipping along...

1. Stop. Stop repeating over and over what you have been doing, saying, thinking. As the adage goes, continuing to do the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome is akin to madness.

2. Stop. I'm repeating that because it is so important. If you stop, you may not like what you see or feel but it is the first step in making change. Stop and breathe, clear your mind and allow what you truly feel or think to come to the surface. Then feel it.

3. Clarity. By stopping you give yourself the chance to get clarity about what it is that is not working for you, with clarity you can chart your new direction. If you have ground your way into a deep rut you may need professional help to do this.

4. Seek help. Seek inspiration, new direction from friends, family, books, music, blogs whatever you can find to set you in a new direction. Sometimes if you have really ground those wheels into the same old groove there is no way you can change track on your own. Don't fool yourself. Even if you feel embarrassed, frightened, nervous ask for help, you may need professional help.

5. Seek good professional help. There are plenty of counsellors, doctors, nutritionists, trainers, accountants etc; out there but not all of them good at what they do. Ask your friends for recommendations.

6. Think progress not perfection. Be very kind to yourself, making change in your life takes courage and commitment. Most importantly be honest with yourself.

7. Remember the words of my wise nan 'attitude is everything'. If yours needs changing, then writing, saying and thinking affirmations is a great place to start. May seem cheesy if it isn't something you have done before but it works. Replace the negatives with positives. The word affirmation literally means - to make firm, and that's what is best for our health positive thoughts about ourself that are rock solid. A good book on this topic is 'Affirmations' by Stuart Wilde.

8. Know that every person (mother) has a bout of the 'I'm not good enoughs', even the most seemingly successful, confident people you know experience self-doubt from time to time. The difference is they don't buy into it, they don't let it stop them from doing what they believe in. So if it shows up say thanks for that and keep moving with the changes you are making.

9. From little things, big things grow. Aside from being one of my favorite Paul Kelly songs this adage is true in both the positive and negative directions. A string of small negative thoughts can overtime grow into a big ugly mess of negative thoughts and behaviours so when you notice them be quick to change them. On the positive flip side, a few small positive changes can reap huge feelings of personal satisfaction. Things as simple as drinking more water, getting more sleep, exercising more, cleaning out that drawer you've been avoiding, soaking in the bath; string all those actions together and chances are you'll feel brand new.

10. And last but definitely not least, at times like this I love to quote 80's rock god Jon Bon Jovi and remind each of you to 'Keep the Faith'.

Believe it or not - the best is yet to come.

Happy Monday to you I'm off to wash the dishes :)

1 comment:

  1. The option 2. of the Rut definition sounds good to me! That would definitely life me out of a 'mummy rut'! heehee!


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