Tuesday, May 20, 2014

feel the fear and cook it anyway




I am writing this for all the mamas who cook with a knot of anxiety in their stomachs and hearts each night. Wondering as they cook, will they eat it? Will there be tears or tantrums?

For the sake of peace and sanity many mothers 'give in' to their children's food likes and dislikes. They bend and weave their way through feeding their children in the small hope that they just eat something.

Falling into the pattern of mono cooking can easily happen - pasta, meat and potatoes, pasta, rice, meat and potatoes - I understand how it happens, really I do. However, it isn't doing anyone any favours. It is so boring to cook this way when we live in a world with so much beautiful food variety, and it is not in any way encouraging our children to eat a wide variety of foods, particularly the all important vegetables. If you think of vegetables as nature's multivitamin pill it makes sense that to get the most nutrients we all need to eat a variety, not just the same two or three over and over. My friend Sally says, "we need to eat a rainbow." This is a good thing to teach and regularly remind our children.

My eldest son River (age 7) is willing to taste absolutely anything from broccoli to brussel sprouts to blue cheese to scallops whatever it is he will at the very least take a bite. When it comes to vegetables my other son, Sol (age 4) is not willing. "I'll eat vegetables when I'm five" he tells me. "I only like carrots in soup" he says.

Occasionally I find Sol's defiance challenging but most of the time I am not phased, I continue to put vegetables on his plate and in his lunchbox, I continue to cook a wide variety of meals with varied ingredients and flavours. Sol knows the dinner table rules, what is served is dinner and he can decide how much he eats and if he eats at all. There is always something on his plate that I know he eats.

Sure I still make their favorites - spag bol (with heaps of veggies grated in), chicken schnitzel and mash potato, home made fish and chips - but I also cook or prepare stews, soups, salads, sushi, rice paper rolls, homemade vegetable pies, tacos, homemade burgers, dahl, roasted meats and roasted vegetables and so on.

When I cook something they haven't tried before I sometimes involve them in the cooking process, this can increase the likelihood of them eating it. I always announce the meal to them with enthusiasm not hesitation and I casually plant the idea in their head that they will love it as I model to them how much I enjoy eating it. I want my sons to develop a taste for a wide variety of good food and they can't do that if I serve them the same thing over and over just because I know they will eat it.

If you've fallen into a bit of a pasta rut it is time to branch out and have another go at presenting a colourful array of vegetables to your family, to introduce some new flavours or ingredients. And to do so with enthusiasm, from a place of leadership not fear.

Can you relate to this post? Share your story in the comments.

15 comments:

  1. Children! I thoughy you were talking about my husband! Haha he is actually very tolerant of my food experiments, but also very honest :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Farmer Liz! Had to take the opportunity to give a virtual wave as I was just last week reading your blog post about the moving of your new/old house and about all the work you've been doing on it. Small world! :) Karen

      Delete
  2. Liz your comment made me laugh! I suspect you are not alone with this. I am very lucky to have a husband who is wholeheartedly committed and enthusiastic about eating wholefood. But yes you are quite right, if it is not the children it is husbands! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Great post Nikki! I was just looking at my kids the other day, marvelling at how they eat anything I put in front of them. I think it's because they never had "baby food." As soon as they started eating solids, they got whatever was appropriate for them from our meals. So I think that their taste buds just evolved like that. We have the same rule about whatever is presented is what is available to eat. I could never be one of those mothers who cooks different meals for everyone, too exhausting, whew :). xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Olga. Interesting comment you make about "baby food", for me the main point in your comment is about the positive role modelling, eating with your children and encouraging them to eat what you are eating too. xx

      Delete
  4. I do need to face the fear of rejection more. But think I prefer Gourmet Girlfriend's approach to eating, I don't want to create an issue about food.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for your comment. I'm interested to know more about Gourmet Girlfriend's approach to eating, love to hear more if you have a link or can explain. I agree I definitely don't want to create an issue about food either! :)

      Delete
    2. http://gourmetgirl-friend.blogspot.com.au/2010/09/fussy-eaters.html

      http://gourmetgirl-friend.blogspot.com.au/2012/03/what-really-happens-at-our-dinner-table.html

      My advice was to 'Give up worrying about it & serve Weetbix' ...well actually I advised Porridge as I know this little lovely has a special love for Oats.

      I have organic oats, weetbix and milk on hand now :)

      Delete
    3. Respecting the cook is still an expectation. A nod to the effort is gratefully received (and EXPECTED) but I certainly will not force them to eat food they don't like. I respect their choice and their different palates.

      From GG Blog

      Delete
  5. This is an ongoing problem in our house and I must admit I have fallen into the rut and if I'm not prepared for the start of the week any structured meal just falls to the wayside. I recently realised that my kids were being picky with the foods they did like and my dinner would inevitably the left overs so why wasn't I just cooking what I wanted. It would be the same result for the kids but better for me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for your honesty Mrs Butters. You are not alone on this one! And yay for you coming to the conclusion you have that you might as well cook what you like to eat! x

      Delete
  6. Great post Nikki, and very timely for me as I think I have fallen into this trap in recent months. I definitely need to shake things up!
    Isn't it strange how we can have two children that are so very different? For me my son (6) is the fussy eater and I admit to getting very stressed about his limited eating. But my daughter (4) will eat just about anything. That is, until her older brother announces how 'disgusting' it is and then she decides she doesn't like it either - aarrgghh!! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Karen. Oh isn't it so repetitious at times dealing with getting children to eat good food! I do think fussy eaters grow out of being fussy and as long as they are exposed to a variety of food and encouraged to eat then we are doing our best. Good luck! xx

      Delete
  7. Oh yes! I relate. It's hard to be creative when you are tired and busy too! I agree enthusiasm goes a long way to encouraging the children. I find that if I come up with a creative name for a self-concocted meal, they are more likely to eat it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like the sound of a creative name Linda, imaginative names do go a long way particularly with young children. Thanks for your comment x

      Delete

Thanks for your comments. I read every one!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...